The Artificer's Studio

So, this is a rant………

I’ve been around the hobby for twenty plus years and have seen a lot of stuff, both good and bad. Recently, I played two games, one against the venerable L. Parker Gibson and the other against a new opponent, whom I will not name (can you foreshadow how this is going?).

The game with Parker went exactly how you would expect it to. We BS’ed more than we played mirrored each others tactic and played a friendly game. We have played so many games over the decades (no joke), that there is no ego or attitude. It is just playing to have fun and hang out. We both try to extend a “congenial” hand to all of our opponents.

When I play a new opponent I tend to play with kid gloves on. I want to get a feel of how well they know the game, their tactics and their sportsmanship. There is no point in hammering a new opponent into the ground. If we beat the bean curd out of ever new opponent, we ruin it for them and we’ll kill the hobby.

On the other hand some opponents are best beaten, bloodied and buried…..

I received a private message on a forum I subscribe to from a player located in the greater Columbus area. They asked if I would like to play a game. After a few e-mails, we arranged a game. We played a store that is struggling and appears to be on its last leg. I met up with my opponent and we got started. I explained I need to leave by a certain time we agreed to play as speedily as possible. The dude pulled out Tau and I had brought my Necrons (because they’re always in the case). My opponent looked over and said “Really? I thought you would have played a real army.” He went on to explain how Necron weren’t competive in fifth edition and he was looking for a challenge because he beats all of his opponents so easily. I smiled as I grew wry of his boosting and replied “Well, I’m not your mother and I don’t go down that easy.”

He setup first and I stole the initiative. In the first turn I hammered him, dropping three broadsides, two hammerheads, 4 stealth suits and stunning two devilfish. In his turn of shooting he knocked down two Heavy destroyers and six warriors, all of which got back up. He continued with his propaganda “I get you next turn!” At 7:45pm we were finishing up turn four and I asked if we could wrap it up and he agreed.

I held four of five objectives and had only lost twelve of sixty warriors, three destroyers and one tomb sypder. My opponent had two half strength warriors squads, two battle suit (each with one wound left, one suit was his HQ), eight drones and three crippled pariahs and devilfish. He held no objective. He agreed I was winning, “but, I could beat your cheesy ass Necrons by turn six, if you could stay, man.”

I called Kendra and told her I’d be late.

I told him we’d finish the game and his attitude changed. He started arguing everything I did. He question moves and line of sight. He complained that my HQ needed to make a difficult terrain test the turn before (which it had and passed) and could understand how it was moving through cover. He question how my Wraths had moved straight through a large piece of impossible terrain. I answered all of his question politely and only gave a little attitude. I tabled him first half of turn six. I held all the objectives. He asked if I had a copy of my list he could have. I did and I gave it to him. He bemoaned his dice and complained that he thought I’d miss lead him onto hand-to-hand combat (I charged him wiped out his fire warriors in two rounds of combat, very misleading). He realized he made several mistakes, including be over pointed by one hundred and ninety-five points. After a little feed back we went are separate ways.

That night He sent me six e-mails, complaining about various little things, majority of which we had covered in the game. He then stated I never let him make his additional battle suit moves and that he should had additional dice with his fusion guns. I explained to him that he had never attempted to make the extra moves (tried to keep them behind cover and failed) and I had no vehicles in my list so he wouldn’t have gotten the extra dice. He continued with two more e-mails of question.

Tiring of underlying “you cheated me” tone of his correspondence, I picked up my phone and called him. I told him I was not sure where he was coming from. I explained he represented himself as a fairly competent player and boosted like he was a tactical god. Continuing I stated that I did not appreciated his attitude towards me, my army or my victory and if he was accusing me of cheating he needed to man up and just say it, not send my eight e-mails whining about his losses and bemoaning my “luck.”

Then he cried.

Well, not really, but it was damned close. My opponent confused that Tau were relatively new to him and he had a string of losses (none of which were as devastating as mine). He had played around ten games and had never done better than tie. He explained that his regular group were very completive, were not always forthcoming with advice and sometimes a little shady. He than stated he was considering sell off his 40k and buying Warmachine.
I could not allow that.

We talked for forty-five minutes and I explained to him that ultimately it is ever gamer’s responsibility to ask question and to answer all question about their armies, game play and rules truthfully. I stressed sportsmanship and how that related to a tournament game and pick-up game. I vilified the “button mashing, quick fix video gamer” archetype and sang the praise of the hobbyist. When all was said and done I think I got through to the kid that this hobby is what you make of it and nothing good comes easy.

But every once and a while it is fun to grid someone beneath your boot heel.